


After the High School Reunion

by Shlomo



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Multi, Threesome - F/F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-16
Updated: 2016-06-18
Packaged: 2018-07-15 11:50:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7221220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shlomo/pseuds/Shlomo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sharla invites her boyfriend, (Officer) Wolford of the ZPD to a high school reunion in Bunnyburrow. Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde come to, of course. This is not that story. That story is still being written. This story, however, is about what happens the day after the high school reunion, which ended with a slightly tipsy ex-cheerleader and ex-prom queen hit on Bill and Sharla who are way more game for anything than one would expect.</p><p>This is the smuttiest thing I have ever written WHAT HAS BECOME OF MY LIFE. </p><p>This is in the same headcanon of works as Severe Tornado Warning and The Howl, but you don't have to read them first if you don't want to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> So I wrote this smutty thing. Huh. There will be another chapter. Don't read this if you don't want smut. I love comments and kudos!

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Sharla asked, giving Bill a sideways look as they clambered out of their rental car.

"Am _I_ sure? Hell yes. It'll be hot as hell. Are you sure?"

"Of course," Sharla said, laughing. "It's so surprising, though..."

"Why?"

"Well...Jen was like, _the_ popular girl at school. Cheerleader, that kind of thing. Prom queen. She even modeled a bit when she was younger…It’s…sexy, that she would want this. It's a turn-on, I guess. Vindication that she would want to do this with someone like me.”

"That she would want to watch the little sheep who was so shy get pounded by her big wolf boyfriend," Bill said, grinning at Sharla.

"Yeah. And, I mean, I didn't exactly expect to get a proposition like this at my high school reunion...."

"Think she has a thing for pred-prey stuff?" Bill said, waiting for Sharla before starting to climb the stairs up to the second floor of the motel, where Jen had rented a room for them. "We are a wolf-sheep couple. That's considered a "sexy" pairing, according to FerRedTube..."

"She probably does have a thing for it," Sharla said, shrugging. "All I hope is that this isn't some kind of...trick or something. Prank. I wasn't very popular in high school..."

"I don't think so," Bill said, rolling his eyes slightly. "She seemed pretty into the idea last night, she kept putting her hands around our shoulders and stuff...Is she related to Judy?"

"Hmm? Oh, probably. A cousin or something. Most of the bunnies here are somewhat related to each other."

"Will Judy mind?"

"Nah," Sharla said shaking her head. "They're not close or anything…I mean, it’s not like we have to tell her or anything…”

They reached the door to the room. Bill looked down at Sharla and placed a hand on the small of her back. 

"Ready?"

Sharla took a deep breath and nodded and knocked on the door.

\--

Jen opened the door wearing a robe. 

"Hi," she said breathlessly, sounding nervous. "I wasn't sure you'd come..."

"Nope, we're here," Bill said easily, guiding Sharla into the room. 

"I know we just agreed that I'd, um, watch you..." Jen said, looking awkward and fiddling with the belt on her robe, "but I thought I'd you know, touch myself. I brought some toys...is that okay?"

"I assumed you would do that, honestly," Sharla said, sitting down on the edge of the bed and tucking her legs underneath her. “I think most people want to do that when they watch people fuck.” Jen stared at her for a moment, biting her bottom lip. She blushed a bit when Sharla said “fuck.” Heh. This was going to be fun, thought Bill.

Bill hesitated a moment, and then sat down next to Sharla. 

"Well," he said, breaking the awkward silence, "is that champagne over there for us?" He nodded towards a bottle of champagne and some plastic cups sitting next to a decrepit television. 

"Oh, yes," Jen said, still sounding flustered. She fiddled with the bottle for a minute, until Bill eventually took the bottle from her -- Jen blushed -- and opened it and poured out three cups of the lukewarm champagne.

"Thanks," Sharla said, taking a small sip. "Jen, come here, you don't have to look so frightened," she said, patting the bed. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yes, yes," Jen said emphatically, laughing a bit. "Please. I'm just feeling a bit awkward right now..."

"We're into it," Bill said, sitting on the other side of Sharla and taking a sip of the champagne. "Don't be nervous..."

Jen smiled, blushed, and looked into her drink.

"So what are you hoping to, you know, achieve with this?" Sharla asked after a moment.

"What?" Jen asked, suddenly looking wary. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, you want to watch us have sex, right? But do you want to...you know, touch us a bit first? Fool around with us? Do you want us in any kind of specific position?"

Jen looked stunned, and embarrassed. 

"You'd...you'd fool around with me?" She asked, her voice a little bit above a whisper. 

"You're very cute," Sharla said after a minute, grinning at her. Jen blushed again. "I guess we don't want to have sex with you," Sharla continued, "no offense. Maybe if there is a next time."

Bill nodded, grinning at the stunned expression on Jen’s face. God, he loved Sharla so much. She was so…weirdly efficient when navigating group sex. She was like a manager of orgies.

"And no kissing on the lips," he reminded Sharla.

"Oh, right. Yeah. We just do that with each other..." Sharla said. "But you know. Kissing other places works..."

Jen looked...well, she looked thrilled. She awkwardly took a sip of her champagne, biting her lower lip afterward.

"Let's see what you have under there," Bill said after a moment, nodding towards Jen's robe and setting down his champagne.

"OK..." Jen said, giggling a bit. She stood up and slid off the robe. She was wearing a pink teddy and small pink lace underwear. She looked, well, astonishing. Her brown fur looked perfectly smooth, she was incredibly in shape — Bill thought he could see a defined abdominal muscle peeking out out from under her teddy — and her almost impossibly big green eyes were stunning. No wonder she was the prom queen at her high school, Jesus.

"Wow," Bill groaned, "you look amazing..." 

"Yeah?" Jen said, shyly, looking nervously at Sharla. Sharla smiled and nodded at her and then waved her over to her. 

Sharla hesitated a moment before trailing her hands over Jen's neck and shoulders, loving how soft she felt. Jen shivered a bit as Sharla did so, gasping slightly as Sharla's hands trailed down towards, but stopping before, her breasts. Bill sighed happily and moved over slightly on the bed, whispering that maybe Jen should sit between the two of them. 

Jen did so, starting to blush furiously as Sharla began kissing her neck.

“Oh…my God, Sharla,” she panted, as Bill watched the two of them happily. He loved watching Sharla with other people. Especially women. Especially good-looking women. Especially good-looking prey women.

He ran his hand down Jen’s back and watched as she jumped a bit. He didn’t want to…well, startle her. He knew a lot of prey would be…pretty apprehensive about getting down and dirty with a wolf. He hesitated for a moment, and then kissed her on the cheek, thinking it would be not very frightening for her. Jen giggled. Well, that was something. 

“Will you…kiss my neck too?” she breathed at him, batting those eyelashes. Heh. Like she had to seduce him, they were already here…

“Mmm-hmmm,” he growled, kissing and licking her neck as Sharla continued kissing her neck and shoulder on the other side of her. Jen was getting turned on, very turned on, Bill could smell. God. Maybe they shouldn’t have said they wouldn’t have sex with her this first time…hmm…no it probably was better. Sadly. But God, the smell of Jen combined with Sharla’s smell, Jesus Christ…He was getting hard. Really hard.

“Take this off,” Bill heard Jen whisper, tugging at Sharla’s shirt. Mmm, Bill thought.

“OK,” Sharla said after a moment’s hesitation. “I feel a little frumpy right now, though…” she murmured as she slipped off her shirt, “I haven’t, you know, sheared in a while…”

Bill liked Sharla fluffy. Well, he liked her sheared too. Probably liked her sheared a little bit better, to be honest, but she usually kept up on that pretty well. When she was busy she didn’t always, and it was…nice. A change of pace. It definitely made her seem more like a sheep.

“You’re so…fluffy,” Jen squealed, grinning as she pawed through the hair on Sharla’s chest. Bill saw her reach something and her eyes widen. Bill grinned. 

“You find her piercing?” Bill laughed. Sharla had piercings on her nipples and her clit, but you couldn’t easily see them when she was as fluffy as she was now.

“Yes, oh my God, _Sharla_ ,” Jen breathed, her eyes wide. “You have a piercing? Jesus. You were always such a good girl, a little teacher’s pet…”

“Mmmm, I bet she was,” Bill said, scooting towards the edge of the bed and spreading out his legs. “Sharla, come here…Jen, I want to show you something…”

Sharla sat between Bill’s legs, Bill sliding off her skirt and panties before she sat down. He ran his hands up and down over Sharla’s torso - loving how her wool felt underneath his hands. He kissed her on the neck, loving that he could smell how turned on she was. 

“I love you so much,” he whispered into her ear, quietly so that Jen couldn’t hear. Sharla moaned.

“Now, Jen…” he said, careful to try not to sound too pushy in case Jen got nervous, “come here…”

Jen came over and stood in front of the two of them, looking a mix between apprehensive and excited. God, every inch Jen came closer to him seemed to exponentially make her scent stronger to him. He grinned.

“OK, look here,” Bill said, pushing up the wool around Sharla’s privates and eventually exposing her pussy and pierced clit. Her clit was harder than normal and she already looked, and smelled, wet. Really wet.

Sharla squirmed and moaned slightly as he got closer to her clit, he grinned widely and looked up at Jen who looked completely beside herself. She was breathing heavily through her mouth, her hands were up tugging on her ears, her eyes were half-shut. She almost looked like she was going to start drooling.

“You like that, huh?” Bill said, now slowly rubbing his hands up and down the outside of her pussy, teasing Sharla, “Looks nice, doesn’t it?”

“Uh-huh..” Jen moaned, now moving her hands to her neck. She looked like she was gritting her teeth too. Heh.

“Yeah, you like it when I present my girlfriend to you like this?” Bill asked lightly, as Sharla shivered.

He had told Sharla how much it turned him on to see her, or be near her, getting fucked by other mammals. How much it turned him on to have other mammals experience something he got to experience several times a week. It made him feel proud of Sharla, and even prouder of himself. When he had told Sharla that, she had been way into it. Way more into it than Bill would have thought, honestly, and she loved it when he played it up like this. She usually wasn’t so quiet and…submissive when they fucked, just the two of them. It was nice, different.

He reached and grabbed her nipple rings and agitated them slightly, Sharla moaning as he did so, and raised an eyebrow at Jen.

“Well? Do you want to touch her?” he said, moving his hands down to Sharla’s pussy again and lifting up her woolly hair again. God, Sharla smelled amazing.

“…Can I?” Jen asked Sharla tentatively. Sharla smiled and nodded at her.

“Yes, please,” Sharla said quietly. 

“See, she’s acting more and more like the teacher’s pet as we speak,” Bill said throatily into Sharla’s neck, biting her lightly as Jen put a quivering hand on Sharla’s pussy.

Sharla groaned and Bill felt her tighten in his lap. God, he might have to start jacking off soon depending on how long they stayed with foreplay…

“That’s right,” he said. “The both of you are doing so well…”

“Yeah?” Jen said, her voice higher-pitched than it was before, “I’ve never, um, done this with a woman before…”

“A little higher,” Sharla panted, as Jen raised adjusted her hand slightly. 

“You can get down on your knees if you want to be closer,” Bill said to Jen, “you wouldn’t have to bend over then….”

Jen swallowed and got to her knees. Bill saw her nose twitch slightly as her head got closer to Sharla’s pussy - she could probably smell it too, Bill realized, his cock getting even slightly harder. 

“You can pull on her piercing a little bit, she likes that,” Bill said easily. “Don’t you, Sharla?”

“Mmm-hmm,” Sharla moaned, gasping as Jen gently tugged on the piercing.

“Your hands are so soft, Jen,” Sharla moaned, raising her head slightly and leaning back into Bill. “Oh, this is so, so good…”

Bill licked Sharla’s neck and nibbled on her ear as he watched Jen stare, transfixed, at Sharla’s pussy, slowly learning how to manipulate it. I bet she doesn’t have a pred-prey thing, Bill thought in the back of his head, I bet she has a woman thing. A Sharla thing, even. 

“Sharla,” Bill asked, nuzzling her neck, “do you want Jen to put a finger in your pussy?”

Jen gasped at the word “pussy” and started blushing a little. God, Bill wanted to throw Jen down on the bed and fuck her to next Tuesday…

“Yes,” Sharla panted.

“What do we say?” Bill teased, pinching one of Sharla’s nipples.

“Please,” Sharla gasped. 

“OK,” Jen said after a moment, smiling up at Bill. “But only because you’ve been a very good girl, Sharla….”

“Very good,” Bill said laughing slightly. “Jen, you’re a quick learner…”

Sharla’s breath caught as Jen placed a finger inside of her.

“You’re so soft, Sharla,” Jen whispered, “and so wet…oh my God, this is the softest thing I’ve ever felt…”

“Harder,” Sharla moaned.

“Now Sharla,” Bill said admonishingly.

“Bill’s right,” Jen said, a grin sneaking across her face. “You should really ask more politely if you want to get a positive response…” 

Jen slid her finger out of Sharla’s pussy — Sharla gasped, oh no, no, no, no keep going — and slowly licked her finger clean while staring at Bill.

That’s it, Bill thought, I’m getting rid of some of the these clothes.

He pulled his shirt over his head, loving how Sharla’s back felt against his torso.

“Please, Jen, please…more,” Sharla murmured. 

“Good girl,” Jen murmured, leaning closer to Sharla’s pussy and sliding two fingers into her pussy. Jen’s face was close to Sharla’s pussy, and Bill could see Jen inhaling deeply.

“No going down on her this time,” Bill said lightly, hoping he didn’t sound overly…worried about that. “Maybe next time. Not this time.”

“Mmmm,” Sharla said, nodding. 

Jen looked up at them. 

“God, I hope there will be a next time,” she murmured. “Do you…do you want me to use my vibrator on you, Sharla?”

Sharla panted slightly, and then hesitated and looked up at Bill. They hadn’t actually discussed that. No strap-ons or dildos they had said, but fingering was deemed acceptable foreplay behavior.

Bill nodded at her shortly, and Sharla grinned. 

“We said no dildos, though,” Sharla said, her voice trembling. 

“Oh, very good, you remember,” Bill laughed, now standing up and slipping off his jeans and his boxers as Jen turned around to retrieve her vibrator from a bag laying on the table next to the champagne.

“No, this is just a vibrator,” Jen cooed as she sat on the bed next to Sharla and motioned for her to swing around, “I’m going to use it on you and then use it on myself when Bill is fucking you, how does that sound?”

“Uh…amazing,” Sharla moaned, a shaking hand nervously running through the messy heap on top of her head.

“Good,” Jen said, finally turning around and seeing Bill standing there, naked and hard.


	2. Conclusion, and Another Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sharla and Bill finish their date with Jen. Jen reveals some things about her -- and Sharla's -- past. Bill calls his sister. Bill, Sharla, Judy, and Nick eat at a cafe, and Jen attends a wedding. 
> 
> Phew! A lot for such a small chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is less smuttier, but I think it is also cuter so....there you go. Also Judy and Nick are actually in this chapter, hooray!

Jen hesitated for a minute, the vibrator in her hands.

"Oh," she said, looking Bill up and down. "Wow. You put that thing in Sharla, huh?"

"I do, yes, often. But keep going," Bill said, grinning and nodding towards Sharla, who was smiling at him slightly. "Go on, she's waiting..."

Jen smiled slightly and walked over to Sharla, holding the small pink vibrator in her hand. Jen sat on the bed next to Sharla and angled Sharla closer to her. Bill sighed happily and sat on the edge of the bed behind the two of them.

"It's very soft," Jen whispered, placing the vibrator on Sharla's upper thigh.

"It's nice," Sharla said, moaning slightly and looking behind her at Bill. "Mmmm, let me lay down in your lap, Bill," Sharla continued. She laid down on the bed and - after some slightly awkward repositioning on Bill's part - placed her head just next to Bill's lap, her head resting on his inner thigh.

"You're hard," she whispered between small gasps as Jen moved the vibrator up and around her clit. 

"Mmm-hmm," Bill agreed, starting to slowly jerk himself off. 

"Sharla?" Jen asked after a moment, sounding tentative. 

"Mmmm?" Sharla answered, sounding slightly far away. 

"Will you...will you tell me what you like Bill to do to you?"

"Mmm, yes, Sharla do that," Bill said, tugging on her hair slightly. 

"OK," Sharla sighed happily. "Let's see.... I like it when he says my name when we're fucking...I like it when he goes down on me, I can feel his teeth on my stomach and legs, a bit --" (Oh God, Bill heard Jen murmur. He grinned.) "--I like it when he goes really fast and then all of a sudden changes to nice and slow..."

Jen stood up suddenly. Bill looked at her, his right eyebrow slightly raised. 

"What's up?" he asked. 

"That's what I want," Jen said after a moment. "That's what I want to see. Do that. Just...just pound the fuck out of her and then take your dick out of her and back in nice and slow. I want to see her face when you do that."

"OK, that suits me just fine," Bill said, laughing slightly and gently pushing Sharla off his leg and standing up.

"Oh," Jen said after a moment, looking at the vibrator in her hand in some surprise, and then looking back up at Bill, "I didn't really touch you, Bill, did I?"

"Yeah, you seemed more interested in Sharla," Bill said, carefully dragging Sharla farther up the bed (she giggled). 

"Is that...OK?" Jen asked, frowning slightly. 

"We just agreed you would watch us fuck," Sharla panted, "this is all extra."

"Says the one who was getting all the attention," Bill teased. "You're definitely sucking me off a little next time we fuck, though," he growled in Sharla's ear as Jen arranged herself on the floor and looked up expectantly at them.

"Go on," she said, grinning slightly. "Come on, fuck your girlfriend nice and hard for me..."

\---

"That was fun," Sharla said, panting slightly.

"Mmmmm," Bill agreed, stretching and yawning widely. He yawned after sex a lot, Sharla had noticed. She wasn't really sure what that was about, but she liked it. He looked so...wolfish when he did it. 

Sharla glanced down at Jen who was staring at the both of them, smiling slightly and looking...well, kind of sad, to be honest. Oh. Sharla scooted over slightly to the middle of the bed, motioning Bill to move over farther along the edge.

"Do you want to come here and lay with us a second, Jen?" Sharla asked. "We can talk..."

Jen smiled and climbed into the bed next to them, resting her head on Sharla's chest. 

They were quiet for a moment, Sharla absentmindedly stroking the fur on Bill's stomach.

"I think I like women more than men," Jen said after a moment. 

"Yeah, no shit," Bill said, grinning.

"Bill!" Sharla said, exasperatedly, looking carefully at Jen's face.

"Sorry," Bill said sheepishly, glancing over at Jen. "That wasn't very...sensitive." 

"You could tell?" Jen said, frowning and peering over at Bill, looking worried.

"You just seemed pretty focused on Sharla, that's all," Bill said after a minute. 

Another minute passed.

"Do you remember that science presentation you did when you were a junior in high school? In the gymnasium?" Jen said, sitting up slightly and looking down at Sharla. 

"Ugh, that was terrible," Sharla said shuddering. 

"I'm going to order a pizza," Bill declared, pulling out his phone. "What do you ladies want? Grass, carrots, and beets?"

"That's fine," Jen said, rolling her eyes slightly. "No, but...never mind."

"No, tell me," Sharla said, readjusting her head and peering at Jen owlishly. "Why are you thinking about it?"

"Well..." Jen said after a moment. "I kind of thought...it was like the hottest thing..."

"Really?" Sharla said, wrinkling her nose slightly. "Me covered in dirty water?"

"What was this?" Bill asked, looking up from the Domarotos app from her phone. "You got covered in dirty water?"

"A pipe broke," Sharla said after a moment, "right above my head in the gymnasium. All this water poured down right on me when I was presenting on the stage. It was awful. I cried for days."

"No!" Jen cried. "You weren't _that_ upset, were you?"

"Of course I was! It was so embarrassing!"

"And you found this sexy?" Bill continued, clicking "pay" on his phone. "I got a small beetle pizza for myself too, but I assume you don't want that..."

"Well," Jen said hesitatingly. "Yeah. You were all...your hair was all matted down and, um."

"The shirt," Sharla said darkly.

"It was white," Jen said, "and you could see right through it. And you weren't wearing anything underneath. And you just stared at the audience for a second, stared down at your shirt, and then you shrugged, literally shrugged, and just walked out of the gym. It was so bad ass."

"I started crying as soon as I was out of the gym," Sharla said, starting to grin a little. "My parents ran out, following me, and basically threw my father's jacket over me and carried me home. Ugh."

"But ever since then, I started, you know. Thinking about you," Jen continued. "I had, I guess, a crush on you."

"Really?" Sharla said, sounding surprised. "Like a real crush crush? I'm not sure we ever talked to each other in school..."

"We did! We did the English project together..."

"Oh...I guess so. You came over to my house for dinner, once when we were working on that, right?"

"Yes! My God, I was so excited for that dinner. I spent like two hours getting ready. I...I used to write all these love letters to you in my diary...."

"Huh," Sharla said thoughtfully. 

Bill glanced over at the two of them and pulled up Clash of Clams on his phone. This might take a while. 

"We don't," Sharla said awkwardly after a minute, looking up at Bill, "you know. Date other people. We just sleep with them sometimes."

"Oh, I know," Jen said quickly. "I'm not...yeah. I know. You two seem very happy together."

"We are, I think," Sharla said, smiling over at Bill. Bill didn't say anything. Sharla cleared her throat. 

"Mmm?" Bill asked, tapping away on his phone. 

"Are we a happy couple?"

"Oh, yes," Bill said, glancing up and grinning. "Sorry. I thought you two were having a moment."

"Just a little declaration of past unrequited love," Jen said, sighing and flopping back into the pillow behind her and tugging at her ears. "I'll never be happy."

"You will," Sharla said immediately. "Why do you say that?"

"I'm too old to come out," Jen muttered. 

"No you're not," Sharla said propping herself up on one elbow. "I mean, come on, you're not even thirty. Bill, will you get my glasses? They are on the bedside table...thanks." She placed the glasses on her nose and blinked a few times. 

"I don't even know if women would find me attractive," Jen moaned, now covering her face with her hands. "I know _men_ do, but who cares about them? They're so...predictable."

Sharla shot a worried look at Bill, afraid he was going to protest that, but he just winked at her slightly and continued playing his game on his phone.

"You're gorgeous!" Sharla continued. "You've _modeled_ for God's sakes! Trust me, women will find you attractive..."

"How do you know? You're not a lesbian...." Jen muttered, now picking absentmindedly at a piece of fur on her arm.

"I like women, clearly," Sharla protested. 

"You like men too! You're not a _lesbian_. Shouldn't I be thinking about dating them? It seems like my best shot at dating a woman, right? But all the lesbians I've known are women who have broad shoulders and go on hikes. And they seem to date women just like them...and, you know. I'm not like that. So does that mean I can't be a lesbian, or be with a lesbian, or what?"

"Stacy?" Sharla said after a minute, "Stacy McDonald? Is that who you are talking about? The beaver who was in the grade below us?"

"....Well. She....might be the only lesbian I've ever known well," Jen said, sounding embarrassed after a long pause. "Or at least the only lesbian who was, you know. Out."

"And she's a _beaver,_ too," Bill said, grinning a large smile. 

"Hah-hah," Sharla said dryly. 

"My sister's a lesbian," Bill said after a moment. "Want me to text her a picture of you and ask if she thinks you're hot?"

"Is that a real suggestion?" Sharla asked, frowning at Bill. "Or are you trying to be funny again?" 

"Would you do that?" Jen asked, her eyes suddenly bright. 

"Oh," Sharla said, shrugging, "OK then. I guess it is a good idea...Well done, Bill..."

"Just my face though..." Jen said, fluffing up her ears slightly and sitting up. "OK. Take a pic!"

"Sure you don't want any of that lingerie in the pic?" Bill asked, grinning and snapping the pic as Sharla shushed him. "What about an Instagram filter?"

Jen shook her head happily and lay back. 

"So you think I could, you know. Date women?" Jen asked the two of them, suddenly starting to look excited. 

"I don't see why not," Sharla said, shrugging. "I've known tons of women who like women, and some are like Stacey, and some are more like you. Feminine, you know?"

"My sister just sent back a wolf howling emoji," Bill said, barking out a laugh. "That means she thinks you're hot. Oh... Now she's asking why it looks like I'm a hotel with a cute bunny. She said she could tell we are in a hotel because of the shitty artwork behind you in the picture, Jen... Now she's writing 'WHAT ABOUT SHARLA' in all caps. Oh, and a few sheep emojis for good measure. Oh, and a crying face. What should I tell her?"

"I guess tell her we had a threesome," Sharla said, shrugging.

"I'm not telling her that," Bill laughed. 

"OK, but I probably will the next time we see her. I don't think she's going to believe whatever lie you come up with."

"I'm a great liar!" Bill protested.

"Are you?"

"Fine, fine, I'll tell her the truth... 'Threesome turned into sudden revelation of guest star's sexual orientation', that's what I'm typing....Pretty succinct, right?"

Bill's phone rang almost immediately after he sent the text.

"Oh my God," Bill sighed, clicking on the phone and holding it up to his ear. 

"Hi, Nancy..." Bill said, "Are you going to yell at me for my sexual activities? That's not very progressive of you....what? She's okay, I think. She wanted to make sure women found her attractive... I know.... What? Is that a joke? You're joking, right? ....A _wedding_? That's a pretty big swing. This is a terrible idea, Nancy. Yes it is. It's even worse than the idea for Mom and Dad's 35th anniversary party. ...Life isn't a sitcom, Nance...Oh, very funny. OK. I'll ask. I'll ask. What do you mean 'play her up'? I don't even know who you are talking about...Oh, wait, _that_ Laura? Oh, that Laura is actually pretty awesome....OK...."

Bill covered the bottom of the phone with his paw and sighed deeply. 

"Jen," he asked grinning slightly. "Would you like to attend a wedding with a friend of my sister's tomorrow night? Her girlfriend just dumped her and she needs a date. It's a fancy wedding, it's for that author Gertrude Grazenstein's daughter..."

"Um," Jen said, blinking. 

"What?" Sharla said, frowning. "That's an insane idea. A _wedding_? What kind of first date is that?"

"Sharla says a wedding is a terrible first date idea," Bill muttered into the phone. "Oho, don't say that about my girlfriend, she is _plenty_ romantic, believe me. Scientists can too be romantic. OK, hold on."

"Is it Laura the weasel?" Sharla interjected, frowning. "Your sister's friend from college?"

"Yep," Bill said, nodding. 

"She _is_ pretty awesome, to be honest," Sharla admitted after a minute, staring at the ceiling.

"She apparently has a thing for quote-unquote 'smaller femme rabbits and squirrels'," Bill continued. "Jen, you don't have to, it's probably a pretty terrible idea..."

"I will," Jen said after a minute. "I'll go."

"Really?" Bill asked doubtfully. Jen grinned at him, blushing slightly and shrugging.

"Why the hell not?"

"OK, she's in. She's nice," Bill said into the cell phone. "No, she went to high school with Sharla. She was the prom queen. ...She _did_ have a crush on Sharla, how did you know that? Lesbian psychic-ness isn't a thing and psychic-ness isn't a word. I'll text you her info....No, I'm hanging up now. No I'm not giving the phone to Sharla so she can tell you how the threesome was--"

"It was fun," Sharla called into the phone, as Bill laughed and pushed her away a little bit.

"You guys are cute," Jen said, curling herself up into a small ball on the bed and sighing a self-satisfied little sigh. "You guys are nice. This is nice."

\--

Post-Script

 

"I'm going to use the bathroom real quick," Bill said, as Judy, Nick, and Sharla were seated at a table at the GrassBerry Cafe in Bunnyburrow (The Best Carrot Pie in the Tri-County Area!). "I'll be back. Order me a coffee if the waitress comes..."

"So, what did you guys do last night?" Judy asked, flopping down into one of the seats. "You weren't at the bonfire."

"I think Bunnyburrow must be the only town that turns a high-school reunion into a weekend-long affair," Nick said, leaning one of his elbows on the back of his chair and grinning slightly. "Most people don't even really like going to these things, you Bunnyburrow High School Alumni seem to love seeing each other so much one evening isn't enough..."

"Oh, we had a date," Sharla said, as the waitress placed four glasses of ice water in front them. "With Jen Jumpko, if you can believe it. The one who was a cheerleader?"

Judy blinked in surprise and a slow grin started to spread over Nick's face. 

"What do you mean a _date_ with Jen Jumpko? What does that mean?" Judy asked, leaning forward slightly. 

"Like we fooled around with her," Sharla said, shrugging. "We didn't sleep with her though, I guess. But we ate pizza. That counts as a date, right? Eating dinner and fooling around?"

"What? Where did this happen?" Judy cried. 

"The Mole Motel..."

"Really?" Judy asked as Nick choked on his water and tried to hold back laughter.

"Yes," Sharla said, picking up the menu. "Why all the surprise? You knew Bill and I did that kind of thing sometimes..."

"Not with _Jen Jumpko_ ," Judy cried, starting to blush slightly. "Not in _Bunnyburrow!_ I didn't think you did it with people you knew! And at a seedy motel!"

"Eh, the Mole Motel wasn't that bad...I think they have new management..." Sharla said unconcernedly, "is the house salad here big or small? I'm pretty hungry..."

"You two are ridiculous," Judy continued, still blushing. "What if your family found out? A _threesome_ within three blocks of your childhood home seems weird."

Bill came back to the table, sitting down next to Sharla.

"Bill," Nick said, extending his hand to him over the table, "congratulations, man."

"What?" Bill asked.

"Stop," Judy said, rolling her eyes at him. 

"I told them about Jen," Sharla said, to him.

"Oh? Did you tell them about how it all ended?"

"Lots of fluids, I bet," Nick said, nodding sagely. 

"Well, sure," Bill said laughing, "but my sister set her up with this weasel named Laura. They're going out tonight..."

" _What? _" Judy cried as a huge grin spread across Nick's face and his eyes lit up. He looked eagerly at Judy, awaiting her reaction with bated breath.__

__"What do you mean your sister set her up with someone?!" Judy asked, looking from Bill to Sharla to Bill again. Nick pretended to cough into his hand._ _

__"Don't spread that around, Bill," Sharla chided him, while pointing out a few of the protein-laden dishes on the menu for him, "she's not out yet. You probably shouldn't have told Nick and Judy..."_ _

__"Man, you guys are amazing," Nick marveled, clearing his throat, as the waitress came up behind him. "Just screwing everyone and then setting them up with weasels. Pretty amazing. Oh," Nick said, looking at the shocked waitress's expression, "Sorry."_ _

__\---_ _

__Post-post script_ _

__"God, you smell amazing," Laura murmured, lifting up Jen's dress and sliding off her panties._ _

__"Yeah?" Jen breathed heavily, blushing. God, Laura smelled good too. And her hands were smaller than she was used to, and she was touching Jen's inner thighs so gently, so tenderly..._ _

__"I, um, a woman has never done this to me before..." Jen whispered, blushing furiously._ _

__"Really? God, I can't imagine why," Laura murmured, spreading Jen's legs apart one the bed and leaning in, "your pussy is _so_ fucking perfect..."_ _

__Jen bit her lower lip and tried to hold back a grin, looking up at the ceiling. This was nice. This was very nice._ _


End file.
